Took a Break

Finally this afternoon I took a break from trying to look through obituaries in Oklahoma. It was late afternoon when I finally heard from Brenda and I was on the way to the library and grocery store, so there was no time to send flowers. My thoughts and prayers will be with the family tomorrow. Brenda said Janet's mom died about two months ago.

I took the boys to the library and it is such a treat. I love the new library it is so clean and new. Gabe has two more huge books to read. He reads out of the adult section! I even took in some books for them to sell and raise money to buy more books! Love my library!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then to grocery shop where everyone, in every aisle, asks how are you doin'. It is too cool!!! I love my grocery store.

This was followed up by a trip by dairy queen for a small ice cream. Love dairy queen, however, Matt says that we have new owners. What??????? I will investigate this further.

Going to bed now and watching "In the Heat of the Night" the original one. Although I prefer the one filmed in Covington. Wonder if they will ever release "I'll Fly Away" that was filmed in Madison?

Dark Mood

object width="425" height="344">

This video is for Janet Lyn. We were so young and the life was so full for us. I remember well going up and down dirt roads in Mansfield with you. Of course your brother took me to the freshman prom. Whatever happen to him? I'm sorry life was short. I hope you had a great ride!!! I can't even remember if we talked much when I went home last time. We should of talked more.

As you can see my mood is a bit dark today. I haven't heard back from Brenda on what Janet's last name was now. So I can't send flowers. I've checked the OKC obits and Ardmore obits and haven't found anything. So when I leave in a minute I'll call Brenda.

On a lighter note. I've spent the last 25 years of my life without family. A couple of weeks ago a second cousin got in touch with me. Today she emailed and told me all about her sisters. They have all moved back to Ardmore. I'm excited and confused at the same time. How do you go through 1/2 of your life with no family and then suddenly the three cousins I adored as a small child find you!!! I will be making plans to spend some time with them as well when I make the Oklahoma trip.

Looks like there will be no rest for me before school starts back, but that's okay. Bonnie Raitt in October will keep me going for awhile!

Death

Today, I learned that a childhood friend has passed away. Janet Carter was one of my running buddies for several years. Her brother took me to the freshman prom, we really did run out of gas on the way home. It was before cell phones and I was panicy. I wish I could find my pictures and post one of us. I checked airfare, but I can't afford it 5 days before payday.

Word is she had just settled a million dollar lawsuit against UPS over a workman comp situation. She was in pain and mixed alcohol with some pain killers. Her boys are older than mine. Janet had a rough life I guess, but we all did. None of us were rich.

Also, today Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcitt passed away, icons of our glory years the '70's.

Emily Dickinson wrote:

Because I could not stop for Death --
He kindly stopped for me --
The Carriage held but just Ourselves --
And Immortality.

We slowly drove -- He knew no haste
And I had put away
My labor and my leisure too,
For His Civility?

We passed the School, where Children strove
At Recess -- in the Ring --
We passed the Fields of Gazing Grain --
We passed the Setting Sun --

Or rather -- He passed Us --
The Dews drew quivering and chill --
For only Gossamer, my Gown --
My Tippet -- only Tulle --

We paused before a House that seemed
A Swelling of the Ground --
The Roof was scarcely visible --
The Cornice -- in the Ground --

Since then -- 'tis Centuries -- and yet
Feels shorter than the Day
I first surmised the Horses' Heads
Were toward Eternity --

I do not know Janet, Michael, or Farrah's spiritual condition. I pray that they were saved and at peace with God our Father.

Diets and Trips

Okay, Matt has to be closely supervised and he is not happy at the moment. I know it is hard, but he cannot late night snack at school. So we are plugging along.

As far as the trip goes, I'm still torn. I want to go, but it will probably be the ed of July now. I have to wait till the 1st to get paid, then I have 9 days of meetings starting the 8th. So I don't want to come home and be exahusted. Plus my brother and dad are going camping the first of July in Colorado. Wonder why they never ask me?

Lots to do in the next couple of weeks. I'm looking forward to the 1st and my hair appointment. I think I settled on a cut.

The Highway is my Home

I spent a funfilled afternoon in the ABAC library reading Vygotsky. Librarian couldn't believe I wanted the book, then asked if I'd like to take it home! I said sure. I'll bring it back on my next trip.

Got another snarky comment from chair today. I don't know maybe she is just not a people person.

So to calm my nerves some Pure Pararie League. Saw them in concert in Norman in 1978 or 1979. (when Vince Gill was the lead singer) I love 'em!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can it be the Dog Days?

I don't think that after 4 days of not working this can qualify for the dog days of summer, but it seems close! It is too hot to breathe!!! I'm trying to accomplish task everyday and deal with the children. I know you want believe this, but for my entire time of motherhood Dan has always taken Matt and Drew with him to work. Now Matt is with me. Bored. Sleeps till noon, stays up till 3 in the morning. Then every now and then him and Gabe try to throw each other around. Dan is gone a good 14 hours a day. He leaves at 5:45am, works 12 hours, and then gets home by 8:00pm. Of course all he wants to do is sleep.

Then there is the thought of going to Oklahoma. I need to go, but it is a $600 trip at least to drive out there. Eight hundred if we do anything! Yuck! So yesterday I thought I could fly MeMe out here and we could do lots of fun things!! Like go to the ocean. Go eat at the Blue Willow. Go to Dairy Queen for lunch. Oh wait...we are on a diet. Also, we need to go see Drew in Kentucky. Another chunck of change. However, I want to spend my summer school money on a new tv and me!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, I am so selfish!!!!

I've got so much to do and I've still got a week to work in July.

It's On!!!

Well me and the big guy (matt) are now on a diet. I figure I owe it to him to toughen up. I took the real age challenge and the results weren't to bad instead of nearly being 50 I'm more like 62. Also, I've learned that in some people stress causes chronic back pain. Who knew????

Anyway, for this week (until I get paid) we are going to do weight watchers. Then after payday. I'm following the Dr. Oz menu plan for two weeks. (The site also plans out your excercise routine.) I'm excited. Today I was telling the boys that we could still have desserts we were just going to learn to like different things (Like cinnomon apples and frozen yogurt).

This will not be easy, it is extremely difficult living with a man who can eat anything and stay thin. But in the long run it will be worth it.

Happy Father's Day!

Happy Father's Day to the best Dad I know. I am an expert on you and your parenting skills. How you would get up with the boys when they were babies and change them. How you potty trained everyone of them. How as soon as they could walk you would take them with you (except Gabe and that was probably me). How you would take Drew to Carman concerts. You'd take Matt camping. And your trips with Gabe to the mega Leggo store.

You've worked hard while they were growing up and you work hard now. So you've always shown them the value of hard work. I'm not sure how that has transferred to them at this point, but I know they all make good employees.

You've been a Christlike example for them and that was probably the biggest accomplishment that you've experienced. You've talked with each of them when they were ready to accept Jesus as their savior and that was huge.

You've shown them that marriage is a commitment. Now you are showing them that sometimes God changes the whole course of your life and it is okay.

So honey, Happy Father's Day. Your greatest accomplishments in life are the ones you've invested your life in!

Tags...

I don't really understand the whole tag thing in blogland. Mainly because no one tags me! However, I do read other people tags and noticed this one:
1. Go to your 6th photo folder
2. Pick the 6th picture in folder
3. Tell the story.

So here goes.

The above pic was taken at Drew's wedding. Has it nearly been 2 years? Hard to believe how time flies. Drew seems so confident, Matt seems like the supportive little brother, Alex is the faithful best friend, and Jacob is the soon to be brother in law. It was a fun day!

My how things change. In a few months Drew will be the best man at Alex's wedding. Matt is now bald and about 6'5". Jacob was engaged and is now single again.

School's Out

IT'S OFFICIAL SUMMER HAS STARTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Memoir Monday

Last night I dreamed of our neighbors when I was growing up in Oklahoma. Where I grew up everyone knew everyone. The Housleys had a boy, David and a girl, Bobbie. Bobbie was closest to my age. There were lots of times growing up when we would be at one house or the other. I haven't thought about them in years, but in my dreams last night I remembered every feature of their house. The kitchen, the shape of the living room, the bathroom, and bedrooms. I even remembered the storage shed. It was very strange for a moment I was back home and things were the way they used to be.

I'm sure this trip down memory lane was brought on by thoughts of a trip home this summer. However, I won't drive past where I used to live...to many memories. I'll go see my best friend from high school, Brenda. I'll stay with my step-mom and her new husband, and my half brother and his family will come down. I'll meet my nephew for the first time. I'll drive by and see my daddy. And I'll be going by the cemetary to take flowers for my mom and grandma's graves.

We had lots of great neighbors when I grew up: the Youngs, the Summers, the Shockleys, and the Houselys. The Shockleys are both dead now, so are the older Summers, and the Youngs.

I don't know what the Houselys are doing, I hope they are all okay.

Sunday Afternoon

First of all Dan had to work today, so I had to teach Sunday School. We got up at 5:00am to get Dan off and give me time to go over lesson. Then I tried to get children up out of bed. Now the one that is almost 20 (in Sept) did not move, the youngest had no choice. I had told everyone to go to bed at 10:30 last night. Apparently there was a party across the street and it kept them up all night. Get through Sunday School, go into church, and Gabe can't keep his eyes open. I'm like ready to strangle him!!!!!! Then I'm afraid he is going to fall out in the floor. At the invitation prayer we left. (He's been awake all afternoon.)

Come home, I tell them to eat leftovers and then Matt has a friend come pick him up!!!! Not real happy but suddenly Gabe and I are alone in the house. Boy was it quiet!

My mind has raced all afternoon. I can't make any phone calls till tomorrow and then only after 2:00pm. I don't know what to do. I feel overwhelmed by this and at peace at the same time. Go figure!!!

Trusting God

I do not think it is a coincident that Dan's SS class starts to study Trusting God and suddenly the Hestad's undergo roadblocks. I'm thinking it is a devine intervention. In Ch. 2 and 3 the main point is "God is in control. He has a purpose and a plan for you, and He has the power to carry out that plan."

Now since the decision was made to start this study. Matt has lost his license for 6 months. He lost ALL of his scholarships because of a "D" in history. He is taking 2 online classes at the tune of $1,100. He has to take defensive driving classes, which I will have to drive him to take. He found out he couldn't get a Stafford loan. Then today...I found out I couldn't get my loan to finish up my dissertation.

Oh there will be phone calls on Monday, but what if God has other plans... Elizabeth Elliot once told of losing her life's work interpreting the Bible into the language of the Acua Indians. How could it have been God's will? But she never doubted. So I shall not doubt but trust that whatever God is doing is the best plan for us.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't believe how udderly horrible the picture in the paper is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The hairs got to get a new do and the weight has got to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Even if it takes drastic measures.

Needing a New Do

It appears that my taste is leaning in the same direction. I know what I'd like it to look like, but can't find an exact picture. Problem 1...I don't want to fix it any more. I'm tired of hair! So which do you like?

Hairstyle 1

Faith (In my mind I'd like to look like Faith, but it wouldn't be good for a teacher to act that way)


Reba

Martina

Perhaps, I just want hair in my eyes. However, one thing I know I'm sick of this look!!! Perhaps if I had hot rollers, because a curling iron doesn't cut it.

Afternoon

I've spent the afternoon trying to get the boys ready for their trips. Gabe leaves for some serious White Water Rafting tomorrow. Matt is going to ABAC to check in with an online class. This all means Dan and I will be alone tomorrow night! However, he is working 12 hour days, so not much will be going on around here.

Facebook

I don't get facebook!!! There I've said it. I get blogs...I like blogs...I tell my friends and family about my blog...but everyone is into facebook. I really don't get it! It is all so criptic. So I think I'll blog.

Ramblings

Summer School was a little rougher this morning. Seems the honeymoon is over! One of them looked at me and said, "I'm ready to go to Mrs. C. I didn't come here to work." I replied, "That is exactly why you are here! For the last 180 days you chose not to work, now you have 5 left to get it right." Every child I'm seeing is more than capable of passing the test. Attitude plays a big part in this problem..

My summer is going south quick. Seems Matt has two online classes, except one of those classes requires 4 on campus classes. Wasn't a big deal till he lost his license. I'm just bucking up and moving forward. It must be extremely difficult to have your license taken away at 19. I remember when my mom was sick, I needed to get her medical help right away. I called the doctor, he said for me to get in the car and drive her to town (10 miles). I said, "What if I get stopped?" He said for me to tell the cop to get me to the doctor NOW! After that he thought the state should give me a hardship license. They didn't, and we made it.

I miss MeMe. Saturday she didn't sound good. The experimental drug is making her sicker. I know that one day this cancer will take her from me, but I'm not ready. I need more time. I need to be closer. I need to be able to cook and help her do things.This weekend I've wondered if we should have moved back to Oklahoma. I know it is probably just the sadness talking.

I'm trying to get Gabe ready for his trip. I've got to get Gabe off at 1:00, then take Matt to Tifton to class. What!!!!!!!!!!!!

The fall wedding season is shaping up this year, August 1, October 10, and October 24 are all must go to weddings. I was opting out of the October 24th one since it is my 50th birthday...that was until today. Drew's best friend Alex is marrying some girl whose Daddy is very rich. They are getting married at Lake Lanier. So today in a huge 8x11 envelope came the wedding planning weekend. Where to stay...prices...activity choices...something about spa treatments. I'm thinking I need to go to that one and be pampered. However, Dan needs to work hard, because I'm not giving up Bonnie Raitt at Mrytle Beach.

So there you go! Lots of happenings! Oh yes and when am I finishing Chapter 2?

Sunday

I woke up this morning with a migraine. Still not feeling up to par. I had one Excederin Migraine which has numbed it a bit...Dan is bringing more after church. I need to be reading dissertations and getting started on Chapter 2. I'm going to set me up a work schedule. July is looking busy with the Reading Conference, CRCT Item Review, and a trip to Oklahoma. Linda sounded bad yesterday, they were working cattle and she was trying to watch Carter and cook. I should have gone out there, but need the Summer school money to make the trip.

Yesterday I heard of a horse trainer whose biggest client (6 horses) pulled them all. I'm sure glad I'm not worrying about that kinda of stuff now. But I asked Dan if he missed it and he does. Not the business end, but the riding end. We are trying to save money to get the fence up and some bulldozer work done. Dan said that he can wait. We desperately need a fence so the dogs could work sheep at least.

Back to dissertation, I really want to change it to a case study, but perhaps I need to stay focused and move forward. I've wasted a lot of money if I don't finish this. I wish I had just gone to LMU and gotten an Ed.S. Teaching 5th grade is too hard these days and leaves no time for anything. I am exhausted at the end of the day! I know....stop complaining...I love teaching 5th grade and the challenge...I don't love this hanging over my head...and an administrator that makes it nearly impossible for me!

Got To Love My Man

I love Dan! Today, he took the boys out for an airing. He went ahead and got Gabe the shoes, bathing suit, etc. he needs for his white water rafting trip this weekend. I love that man. Plus he bought a brisket. I'm feeling it! And I know he wanted to lay in the recliner. After working 13 days straight at 12 hours per day. I KNOW going out with the boys wasn't on his plan.

Now mind you a couple of things are too small, but that doesn't matter in the least. And Gabe talked him out of getting a hair cut. What matters is he did it for me! I had 6 hours at my house alone!!!!!!!! Even if mopping and laundry were involved, I was alone!!!!!!!!!!

Lovin' him!!!!!!!!!!

Lipstick Ranch

Okay, so the name attracted me to the site. However, KC Willis is having a $300 shopping spree. Her art is eclectic like me!!!!!!!!

Guess What?

I unhooked myself from the new horse show. YEAH! Making room for that dissertation thing!

Today I got a criptic message from my advisor today, seems that the academic advisor sent her a message about me going through the proper lines of communication. I was shocked. Couldn't figure it out! About (get this) a year ago I contacted my academic advisor and the Dean of Ed.D asking for a new advisor. A YEAR AGO PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!! You know it was more than I could take not to send back a snippy email.




I'm going to plan out my summer and move on!!!!!!!!!!

Wouldn't you know it!

My hair looks like crap. This has been going on for months. I don't know if it is thyroid related or menopause related, but I've had about all I can take! So wouldn't you know it today the newspaper came to take the picture for my teacher of the year interview. Dear me!

Summer school wasn't bad. I know I'll love the money. However, someone has roped me into doing another horse show. Fast talking cowboys get me in trouble every time!!! Dan was sitting there in his sleep going, "NO, NO." It just makes me tired. I don't want to think of anything else.

What Was I Thinking!

I'm off to teach the first day of summer school. Remember the last post where I discussed my money-grubbin' ways, well again that would be why I'm in this shape. However, I think at my pay scale I'm going to be close to $200 per day. Not bad.

Yet, that doggone DISSERTATION awaits my magic. Our school is not condusive for research, the top dogs change things too much. A dissertation is a research project that has to be set up as much as a year before the actual research! Help me!!!!!

I have had a facebook page since Drew went to college and now all of a sudden it has taken off. Of course I can't keep up a blogspot and a facebook page, but I've found a lot of folks. For instance Simon the Rabbi from up north. A doctoral sounding board. My New York friend Jasmine, hasn't been writing lately.

Yesterday one of my cousins contacted me. We haven't seen each other in over 20 years. I was so excited! She's one of the closest to my age and we used to have a good time together. I've missed being able to share with her over the years. So that was a real happy surprise.

Monkey, Bean, F, and Nanci went in together a bought me a huge canvas of this pic to celebrate me being TOTY.

LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And can't wait to add to it. I'm sure some summer school money is going to this company.