Today has been a tough day! When I finally woke up I was dreaming of my mom. Since she has been gone for 38 years it isn't something that happens. Then Dan said he bought me a Christmas present. I thought we weren't buying each other Christmas presents. Then I figured out without peaking what he bought. Then I was depressed, because if you wanted to spend money on me why wouldn't you pick something more romantic and personal. I was/am totally bummed. Call me petty, but it seems that no one in my family really knows me. I'm just the woman who cooks and cleans. There are no suprises, and I promise I have not petty.
In the midst of my gloomy mood, I stood up F and others at one of my favorite restaurants. Do I need happy pills? Something that makes me not care.
From there this day has just escalated. Dan wanted to finish Christmas shopping, then I said something that made him mad and he walked out of the store. We still aren't speaking and I don't feel like apologizing. (I always apologize) I must be getting old and cranky.
I still am on the verge of tears, but know that it will get better. I've got a physical on Monday and might need to talk to the doctor.
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